Sila nerangal

Frequent power cuts. Frequent cable TV cuts exactly when I want to see DragonballZ. Frustration seeps in when I switch on the Tv and find the blue screen instead of Goku holding up the spirit bomb. Frustration spreads like blood through veins when I hear the beep-beep of the UPS signaling a black-out. I take a walk through Dr. Hannibal lecter's memory palace to ease the frustration. The power comes back on.

I want to sketch a wolf, write a ballad, a story, sit on a cliff facing the sea listening to John Denver sing "You fill up my senses..." or Bono crooning "With or without you...". I hum a tune thinking how farfetched these are, some because I'm lazy, others because I dunno why.

I find myself having lots of time to spare and at the same time in need of it. I'm occupied but bored. If I'm really not bored then it so happens that it is short-lived. Long holidays suck. Correction. Long holidays at home suck. Especially when your friends have exams.

I have this recurrent image of a beach where I sit near the shore, watching the gulls circling the sky, letting the grains of sand drift slowly to the ground through the gaps in between my fingers. The sand always manages to slip through. A silent tear and a smile simultaneously visit my face. I find this image both dreamy and haunting. Like a puppy which has injured a leg but still licks your hand.

Do people really put smileys to depict their mood or just for the sake of conversation? Are people really what they say they are? Is the crow really a cuckoo instead?

I'm bored..